My darling, oh, I must have you

I love my boyfriend, because he is awesome, and I sound like a 15 year old girl but I don’t even give a shit. He really is awesome, and I never got a chance to say that sort of thing when I was a 15 year old girl, but I get to now. I feel lucky and happy to have him and he made me scream so loud the neighbors pounded on the wall but it was like 4 in the morning so I can’t really blame them. We fit well together, in so many ways. Things have been amazing lately. We’ve been doing lots of kinky stuff and it’s been… everything I ever wanted out of that kind of exchange, but never knew how to get. I feel fulfilled and just good. It’s weird which parts I find I relish. One of my favorite things that happened last night, right before we went upstairs we were talking about pain and punishments and he was trying to explain a concept to me and get me to think about it critically but I was not actually putting effort into trying to think critically. We got upstairs and I could tell he was sort of mad at me, so I asked him if he was. He said he was irritated with my lack of trying and I realized he was right. We talked about the importance this dynamic plays in our relationship and I apologized, and told him he was right, and I laid my head on his lap and he messed with my hair and I felt genuinely sorry, but the thing is I enjoy feeling genuinely sorry and it gives me this certain very unique feeling twist of dark pleasure that touches me in a deep place. It’s weird and at times highly confusing and sort of bad… but there is nothing quite like it. Anyway, I’m recording it terribly, but that whole interaction and just hearing him talk about how important this is to him was just… good. Special. Afterward we continued on with a myriad of activities of a sexual and somewhat violent nature, eventually culminating in an orgasm that made the neighbors bang on the wall at 4 in the morning. I look forward to the next scene we do. Tonight, we are watching Hannibal and maybe more game of thrones (My love is finally watching it with me, and I’m waiting for him to catch up before I watch the new ones… which is taking a decent amount of patience. 😛 ) 

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