English major problems and ROASTING HOT CARS (and rope)

Sooooooo yeah, um… I’m now going into my second week with no freelance work. I have been trying my best to get stuff going but so far no one has gotten back to me and it freaks me out and sucks. It’s making me feel pretty stressed, and wicked fucking guilty and also like a terrible shitty failure at life. Like I’m letting down my boyfriend and my parents and not pulling my own weight. I had the chance to take a temporary job that would start in the middle of August, but I turned it down. Mainly because it pays $9.00 an hour and I would make less than $200 a week. I’m used to making $20-25 per hour for my freelance services. It makes me feel gross and used (not in the way I like) to make less than half of that for really hard, really terrible customer service job where I get treated like a servant (not in the way I like).¬†I’m not saying that I feel like I’m above that kind of work… except secretly I do. I have a BA and years of experience in a variety of different fields and I shouldn’t have to fucking work shitty jobs that pay $0.50 over minimum wage. I’m just not going to do that shit anymore. SoooOOooooo I’m going to keep trying to score some freelance gigs and try to communicate with people and e-mail them the right amount to seem determined and persistent but not annoying and obsessive and abrasive. I feel like it’s a fine line and I’m not super good at determining where it is.

In other news… my brother and I did some recording last night. My brother was laying down some vocal tracks and I ran the sound board and everything. Nights where I don’t have to sing are much less stressful for me. ūüėõ ¬†We have been talking for a while about how we both feel like we sound really awesome when singing in our cars, so we decided to try recording in his car, because why not right??! Soooo we set it all up, which took like a half hour.


Here’s a really shitty blurry picture I took. (The garage lighting was horrible for picture taking) You can see the sound board over there on a chair and my bro in his car (he drives a retired police cruiser which is fun and awesome and hilarious cuz people pull over for him sometimes) And we had the microphone going through his window and you can sorta baaarely see it there in front of his face. The thing about recording is, just because something sounds good to the naked ear doesn’t mean it’s going to translate well to a recording at. all. The sound we got out of this was *okay* but not spectacular, and certainly not good enough to suffer through FUCKING ROASTING TO DEATH IN THE SUPER HOT GARAGE. Soooo we packed it all up and set up in the living room and recorded there instead. All in all it was fairly successful.

In other other news… my boyfriend has been watching Shibari tutorials basically the whole time I’ve been writing this and trying out knots ¬†and it’s hella distracting. Oh man he just made a really nice bit gag out of rope and TRIED IT ON ME to make sure it would fit and that was VERY distracting. ¬†So, I guess despite the stress of things un-known, my life is pretty dang sweet.

Coming soon: Reviews for the free kindle smut I’ve been reading, reviews of products for curly hair, more random rambling and personal stories about my life.

AaaAaaaaAAAaaand that’s basically all that’s going on with my life at the moment. How are you guys doing? TeLl Me AbOuT yOuRsElVes!!!!111!!!

Woah dang!

I should be asleep but I’m all hella awake for some respiration
Raisin ore another. *insert terrible beatboxing here* Swype keyboard you know your own name but you suck at other stuff. I’m playing a dumb phone game where you shot dinosaurs. Ima still put together a playlist for reasons. Yarrr I’m tired and should try to sleep and maybe later figure out what to do with my life. I got hella free smut and random horror books and smutty horror books on my kindle so that’s fun.

Playlist 10: Unwanted Week Off Edition

I didn’t have any work this week (which kinda sucked) So I didn’t really listen to music like I usually do. However, I still pulled this shit together by looking back through my Pandora likes. Ummmmmm yeah! I really don’t have anything else to say. Here’s some songs with good words and sounds and stuff.

Have a good weekend you guys, and also hopefully myself.

1, Grizzly Bear – Two Weeks

2. The Kooks – Naive

3. The Cold War Kids – Hang Me Up To Dry

4. Gregory Alan Isakov Р Suitcase Full of Sparks

5. Parov Stelar – Booty Swing

6. Jack White – Lazaretto

Being an adult?

SoooooOOooooooOooooo I haven’t gotten any guides for this week or heard anything from the main lady person about getting more or anything. All in all, that freaks me out. Kind of a lot. Financial uncertainty wise… it’s pretty shitty. I’m going to email her tomorrow I think, if I don’t hear from her before then. AaaaaAaannnyways, this uncertainty pressed me into applying for a shitty temporary minimum wage job at the college bookstore. I’ve done it a couple times before, and it’s always fairly awful. But I feel like I need to do SoMeThInG … am I right? (Yes, yes I am) It actually pays $0.50 more than minimum wage. Hell yeah, now we talkin’. ({sarcasm}) Not even 100% sure they will hire me, considering I refuse to do full time because fuck that and also no and also screw that big time hell no I’d rather be poor forever than kill my soul like that. Soooooooo we will see. I have two more weeks worth of money that is still going to come in. I’m seriously hoping this is just a short temporary very short lull in stuff for me to write for money, and it will pick back up soon. That’s what I’m hoping, please and thank you universe, because getting paid way good money to write stuff that’s pretty easy to write from the comfort of my own home is 1,000% better than any other shit job I’ve ever had in my entire life. (I’ve had a few man, let me tell ya)¬†

Meanwhile… I should probably go to the store and stuff because I don’t have things and I need to get some stuff. It’s weird to not have any work today I should be doing productive stuff but so far I HaVe NoT.¬†

Playlist 9: 696969

Six songs in playlist #9. Honestly I had a couple more I could have put on here but I decided against ’em because I just wasn’t loving ’em when I went through and listened to the videos. Plus, this way I got to label this playlist with a bunch of 69s for a valid reason. *high fives a bunch of 12 year olds who think that’s funny*

I finished all my work so I should’t have anything to do tomorrow (See: later today when I wake up) So that should be nice, even though I won’t be making as much money as I’d like. Dunno what’s going to happen article wise honestly. I hope I find out soon. I’m hoping for a fun, good, relaxing, stimulating weekend. I’m wishing peace and love and love and peace to all my digital friends and peeps.

1. Spoon – I Turn my Camera On

2. Tunng – Woodcat

3. The Used – The Bird and the Worm

4. Beck – Go it Alone

5. The Dirty Heads – My Sweet Summer

6. Twenty One Pilots – Car Radio

Come to the gym with me, then leave me alone!

So I often take my brother and occasionally my boyfriend to the gym with me, but once we get there I’m just like… peace out. Leave me alone and let me do my thing. I really don’t like interacting or socializing or talking at all really while I’m working out. It’s private time for me and my muscles and my brain, even if other people accompany me. They both know this and totally leave me alone to do my biz and they do their thing.¬†

Also the two of them, the two main dudes in my life are currently sharing a pair of earbuds and passing them back and forth and I find that hella amusing for some reason. My bro has his own pair but he perennially leaves them at our parents’ house for some reason.¬†

Sooo I finished all my work fairly early today, and after a trip to the gym and the store I am now back home just chilling. We are going to have a mid-week chill evening and watch things and eat tacos and drink alcohol maybe. My article queue is totally empty actually which is sorta freaking me out. I emailed the main lady to ask for more but she hasn’t gotten back to me yet and it’s all making me sorta paranoid. I’m going to email her again before I go to bed (at like 6am lol) if I don’t hear from her before then. Hopefully it will work out. In the mean time I’m going to try and chill.¬†

Peace out Wednesday peeps. 

Booooks and such!

I’ve been reading aaay lot the past few days/weeks?. It’s 6am and I should be going to sleep but whatever. I’m writing about books fuck you perceptions of TIME and also MORNING-NESS. SO… here we go! This is a new segment I like to call: Alison reviews books super fast like seriously 10 seconds per book at 6am when she is wicked tired and should be asleep.¬†

Odd Thomas by Dean Koontz 

Dang, this kid can see hella ghosts. Just.. hella ghost all the damn time. This book was quite enjoyable overall. I’m not a huge Koontz fan but i liked this. Mixture of funny and also sadness because of death and ghosts duh. I wouldn’t say it was WICKED DEPRESSING… but I DID need to read two other books before I felt emotionally ready to start reading the second one in the series… so there ya go.¬†

– Worthy by Lia Black

Yo, if you’re looking for a short, free kindle ebook that is about a dystopian future and involves aaaay LOT of kinky gay sex, like seriously, so so much kinky gay sex, this is the book for you kid. It really is. Honestly I liked it okay and the attitudes of both the main characters had me like yoooooo at more than one point.¬†

– Divergent by Veronica Roth

I requested this at the library a few months ago and it finally came in and I went to the library to pick it up only to realize it was actually an eBOOK and I was dumb. Overall an enjoyable read. I finished it in like two days. Main character is decent, coulda done without so much hetero romance bla bla bla. It’s kinda ¬†like if Harry Potter and The Hunger Games boned and had a kid, and then their kid grew up and fucked Ender’s Game or something.¬†

~~~ This ends today’s thrilling installment of¬†Alison reviews books super fast like seriously 10 seconds per book at 6am when she is wicked tired and should be asleep. ~~~

Playlist 8: Eight in Eight

This week has felt simultaneously long and short. Or maybe it hasn’t felt like too much of anything? It seems like two seconds ago we were hanging out and listening to my last playlist, but now here I am doing this, and lots of stuff happened in between. It’s been a sort of weird week I guess. I think I’m glad it’s over and I’m hoping for a smooth weekend. Please. Please. Please.

Not too much variety this week actually, mostly indie type stuff. I guess that’s what I’ve been digging.

1. Passion Pit – Sleepyhead (One of my lost songs from last week, found.)

2. Band of Horses – The Funeral (Slow, but the chorus has been getting stuck in my head for a couple weeks so I figure I owe it a playlist spot)

3. Two Door Cinema Club – Cigarettes in the Theatre (Indie dance party!)

4. Dr. Dog – Heart it Races (Nice beat, nice lyrics, ‚̧ ‚̧ dogs)

5. Grouplove РTongue Tied (Is grouplove referring to an orgie? or just a love of groups in general?)

6. Telepopmusik – Breathe (Chill beats, electronic-ish)

7. Blind Pilot – Oviedo (Reminds me of Rocky Votolato sort of, quite nice.)

8. My Chemical Romance – Helena (I love this video forever, shut up I’m an adult whatever don’t talk to me.)




My weekend: An EXPLODING TOILET and some kinky things.

Sooooo this weekend was … uuh… weird. Fairly stressful. Let’s have a rundown, shall we?

– Friday:

4th of July. Went to my parents’ house because they were having a party and my dad really wanted me to go so I would have felt like a shitty daughter if I didn’t go. It went alright. No big monstrosities, there were a few people there I could have done without seeing but overall it went better than I feared it might. The fireworks show was fairly unimpressive. My parents bought me 30 rolls of TP and 12 rolls of paper towels at costco and they gave them to me and I was psyched. We came home and drank some weird peach flavor “moonshine” and watched movies and partook in light sexual activities and went to sleep.


AM: my bf was feeling sick so he went downstairs to hang out and drink water and whatever. I woke up to him standing beside the bed telling my sleepy grouchy self what felt like a very long winded story. The point of the story was, there was FUCKING WATER dripping from the light fixture in the kitchen. Soooooo I got up and went downstairs and ¬†turned off all the circuit breakers so he wouldn’t get electrocuted and he took the cover off the light. We were all … what the actual fuck??! but being Saturday, it’s impossible to get a hold of the apartment management. We put a bucket under it, left the kitchen breaker shut off and just kinda shrugged. I went upstairs planning to go the fuck back to sleep. First I took a short trip to the bathroom. There was water on the ground by the toilet and I was kinda like ??? but I didn’t put too much thought into it cuz the shower is right there and I was hella tired. I flushed the toilet, and it overflowed like CRAZY. Like… there was not a good reason for it to overflow, it was just broken as hell. It basically exploded water all over the place. Water started GUSHING from the light fixture in the kitchen. Mystery solved. We frantically tried to find an emergency maintenance number. I ended up calling my parents and being like … WTF should I do? I’m not a real adult help me! Just as I was talking to them my boy found the emergency numbers. After lots of calling with little results we got a hold of a plumber who said he would come right over. I called my parents back to tell them what was happening, my dad tried to instruct me on how to make the toilet stop producing water but it was so fucked up that it just flushed again and exploded water all over again. Water was streaming down the hallway. I could hear it CRASHING DOWN in the kitchen. My boyfriend was freaking out trying to stop water from getting into the closets and I just stood there watching as the bathroom rug gained buoyancy and floated away. The plumbers finally arrived. In just a few minutes they temporarily fixed the toilet, but they said it definitely needs to be replaced. They left, we thanked them, put fans all around the house so it would dry and went the fuck back to sleep. Once it was dry we had to put everything back in order and clean everything and my boyfriend did most of it because he is a rad dude.

Before all that CHAOS went down we had been planning to ~switch~ that night and do some … adult activities together. Once we got everything under control he said he was still up for it and I said I was too. So, we went to the store and got our supplies and came home. The night actually went quite well. After a slow start we really got into it and I had a mental list of things I wanted to try on him and I tried them ALL. I made a convincing Dom (Domme I guess?) and I was proud of myself. (He acquitted himself quite well too.) I did an ice brand on him. It basically creates a burn and the mark lasts for up to a month (sometimes even longer). It was one of the things I wanted to try and he thought it sounded cool (pun slightly intended?) and gave me his permission so I did it. It came out like this


Not bad considering I HAND CRAFTED a star shaped ice cube. But seriously don’t try this at home kiddos unless you reeeally know what you’re doing and have 1,000% full consent of both parties because you could cause serious damage if you fuck it up. It’s still irritated and itchy two days later, but he says he is happy with it overall. Soooo after that there were lots of sex things and aftercare and we both enjoyed ourselves and I’m not going to go into details sorry.


We spent most of the day chilling, recovering from the crazy ass Saturday we had had. We had planned on doing another scene that night where we switched back to our normal (lol @ “normal”) roles. It started out okay but like halfway through we realized that it was too soon upon the heels of the previous night. As much as we both wanted it neither of us was really ready and we were grating against each other in un-fun ways so we just stopped it cold. We finished the night with alcohol and cuddling and watching GHOSTBUSTERS 2. I was so distracted that I forgot to claim my week’s earnings in a timely manner.


which means I should have gotten paid like… NOW but since I forgot I won’t get paid for another 24 hours, which really sucks because I only had $14 in the bank. Also no word from the toilet people yet. (laughing at myself for calling them toilet people)


On Saturday on the way to the store we found a random pair of skis leaning against the big garbage bins and took them.


Neither of us ski but we have these now.

Playlist 7: Early Morning Lost and Found

Looks like it’s gunna be a fairly short playlist this week, because my internet DIED and it didn’t save my draft and I remembered most of the songs but I could not remember what the last two were… and it’s almost 6:30 in the morning and I don’t feel like looking for any more soooo…. that’s okay I guess. 7 songs for playlist #7 works I suppose. Well, you can’t say it’s not eclectic anyway, I’ve got a viking metal song on here as well as a contemporary Bollywood jam.

Today is the 4th so … there’s that. I hope you guys have a real nice weekend, and I hope I do too. Peace. Love. Stay safe. Don’t explode yourselves with fireworks or catch anything on fire.

1. My chemical romance РFamous last words

2. Sea Wolf – Middle Distance Runner

3. Matt Costa – Mr. Pitiful

4. Brett Dennen – She’s Mine

5. Love Aja Kal – Aahun Aahun

6. Noah and the Whale Р2 Atoms in a Molecule 

7. Ensiferum – Guardians of Fate