I’m not a fucking toaster

Hey kiddos, how are you doing? I’m doing alright-ish, mas o menos. Trying to bust out one more article before I go to bed. Trying to deal with paperwork to get my fucking health insurance in order, and it’s taking a million times longer and it’s a million times dumb-er than it should be. Since I’m “self employed” as a freelance writer they are making me turn in a tonnn of stupid paperwork as proof of income. SooOoooooOoooo I need to try and pick that shit up tomorrow, fill it out as soon as possible, and turn it in. or mail it and somehow magically get it there by MONDAY. Being an adult is wicked overrated, let me tell ya. 

So anyway, my boyfriend’s BDSM style tumblr has been sorta blowing up recently (I’m not going to post a link to it here because of reasons and also there might be some NSFW pictures of parts of me on there. Or maybe there aren’t … I dunno. I wouldn’t mind some of you guys I actually know from xanga and stuff seeing it but not you strangers.) And he’s been getting a lot of anonymous questions (which is a thing on tumblr) and some of these peeps have crazy misconceptions about the whole ~~lifestyle~~ and he’s gotten a couple asks from people who seem to think that he *literally owns me* Which is not the fucking case thank you very much. Anyway he always answers them well and provides info about the importance of CONSENT in such activities and the fact that I’m a FuCkInG PeRsOn and this is only one aspect of my being and it does not encompass all that I am … and stuff. I find it half amusing and half annoying and half sorta sad. (yeah I know that’s 3 halves shut up) The title of this entry was my response to one of those asks and since then I have been referring to them as toaster asks and I have been exclaiming that I am not a toaster at random points throughout the day for the last few days. 

We actually might ~switch~ at some point this weekend maybe possibly, which I’m kind of nervous and slightly excited about. We do this occasionally, every once in a while, it’s been quite a long time. In the yin-yang dynamic of our relationship, he refers to it as “getting his white dot.” (and I know traditionally the black represents femininity and the white masculinity but in our relationship he is the dark half and I am light and that’s just how it is.) A dominant role is not natural to me. It makes me kind of uncomfortable and I don’t like taking it up often, but I am not a fucking toaster and I can decide to do it anyway if I want. And really, I guess I need my black dot too. I have a couple things in mind I would like to try on him, assuming of course that he consents to them beforehand. 

Welp! It’s 5am and I did not do any more of my actual writing but hey! at least I wrote a really long entry about kinky stuff with cursing and references to small appliances! Have a good night or morning or whatever it is for you. 

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