G(rad)

I turned my grad school application in on time, despite a number of setbacks. I lost two poems in a tragic saving failure, and one of them I couldn’t put back quite right… Which drives me absolutely up the wall with rage if i think about it for too long so I’m not gonna do that. Anyway, after dealing with that, the internet died. I was watching my parents house and I tried everything to fix it and nothing worked. I even talked to tech support for like an hour, as they told me to do all the things I had already tried and finally said they would have to send someone out to fix the lines. So I went to fucking Starbucks, and ordered a Grande ice coffee with one splenda and room for cream. I sat at a tall tall table and opened up my laptop and pored over my application one last time. I made tiny corrections to my writing samples, trying my best to ignore the din of other people talking and working. Trying my best to quiet the little panic beast inside of me, screaming about how i wasn’t good enough. I sipped coffee, and took deep breaths, and paid the non-refundable $50 application fee… and clicked submit. Not exactly how I wanted that personal… potentially life changing moment to go down… But there you have it. I got it done.

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