trembling to its tune

It’s bizarre that it’s already March. It’s freaking me out. Boy howdy, I sure hope my internet doesn’t get shut off before I get the chance to pay it. I have a deadline at 7pm tomorrow, and it could really fuck everything up royally if it gets shut off before then. I’m hoping against hope it will hold out until tomorrow, or that I get the money early style tomorrow. Either one of those things would be ideal. I hate this assignment. It’s killing my soul in little measures. I’m using my writing for capitalist evil. Everyone wants me to write this stupid vampire book that I had an idea for, but it’s pretty stupid and I don’t like vampire shit anymore because I’m not my 15 year old self. I dunno. There’s just so much shit to work out with it, I could probably do it tho. It might even be decent… in a -stuff I wouldn’t really wanna read but I bet some kids would- type of way. I could make it hella queer and stuff I suppose. My original idea was a male protag but I could make it a girl. Girls are cooler. Hella Bi vampire girl having adventures and shit. IDK.  Whatever. I don’t really have time to think about it right now. It’s 2am and I have to write like… at least 10 more stupid little blurbs about old ass video games that it would be hard to get me to care less about. Q: how long is that going to take me? A: I don’t fucking know really, but a hell of a lot longer if I procrastinate forever and do shit like this and stuff. In theory, I should find out about grad school sometime this month. … in theory. Hoping for the big envelope to come in the mail. C’mon big envelope! I’m definitely not a huge fan of having to wait 2 months to get important information that may alter the course of my life. Definitely not a big fan of that at all. Man, I feel so fucking restless. Antsy. I need more gum and weird little pieces of plastic to chew on. I need to stay strong, and to focus. I need to row. I need to get back to work.

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